BROWNIE

In the typing of the title for this, I am made quite hungry for a brownie. I am a fan of brownies. I like brownies better than cake, or ice cream, or pie, but not cheese. Cheese is all. Anyway, I think one of the reasons I really like brownies, besides them being tasty, is a nice memory associated with them. When I was quite little, around three or so, there was a time period where my dad would take me out to breakfast every Saturday morning. This was a huge thing, as my dad was not one of those hands-on dad guys, and seemed very mysterious and legendary and like you'd have to book months in advance to get a hello from the guy.

We'd go to a little coffee shop in town, and the routine was always the same. My dad would bring along the newspaper, we'd sit at a Formica table with shiny silver salt-and-pepper shakers, he'd order a black coffee and a poached egg on toast, and I would order a brownie and a glass of milk. My dad, being a guy and all, didn't think twice about letting me have a brownie for breakfast. It wasn't even a great brownie, just came in cellophane, mass produced Dolly Madison or something, dense and flattish and uniformly chocolate, a little too sweet. But I was so happy every time.

We would sit there, silent,and read the paper as we ate. Sometimes my dad would talk a little to some of the regulars there, but mainly we would just do our thing. I was so thrilled just to be in his company, and to be eating a brownie at nine in the morning. I wonder if he had any idea how nice that made me feel, or that I would remember it so fondly all these years later. I felt so important and grown up sitting there.

But after awhile, we went less and less, and then didn't go at all. I think there were a lot of reasons, none having to do with me, but. It leaves me remembering how important a little one-on-one time is with each of my kids. Really important.

The brownie fondness has remained, although last week for the first time ever I left part of a brownie uneaten on my plate. It was very very good, but I had enough.