To: Couch Teen
From: Mom
Re: towels
This is official notice to inform you that if you attempt to co-opt my brand-new beautiful fluffy white Waverley bath towels with the satiny scroll inset for your own personal use, I will take said towels and ram them down your gullet with a pre-Civil War musket. Thank you for your co-operation in this matter.
Sincerely,
Mom
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