HAPPY FESTIVUS

Did you know that Festivus, celebrated every December 23rd, is not just a reference from Seinfeld? No, it is much more, and with no proof whatsoever, Festivus (or the spirit of it) dates back to ancient Roman times. Common folk would be crappy and unrestrained on official holidays while the upper classes would be extra snooty. I would say as an aside here that Zooey Deschanel is not at all snooty. Anyway, Festivus as outlined on Seinfeld is celebrated by the erecting of an aluminum pole, airing of grievances, and showing feats of strength. I can't think of a better trifecta for a holiday, really.

I spent my Festivus wrapping Christmas presents, then going to a Happy Hour with friends. We did not erect a pole (to our knowledge), we did air grievances, but did not mud wrestle or anything like that. I would have mud wrestled though, because I had three large beers and mud has wonderful healing properties for the skin.

I'm going to stop writing now before I get myself into trouble.

Jerry Seinfeld: "And wasn't there a Feats of Strength that always ended up with you crying?"
George Costanza: "I can't take it anymore! I'm going to work! Are you happy now?!"
Frank Costanza: "I've brought one of the cassette tapes."
Frank Costanza (on a tape recorder): "Read that poem."
George Costanza (on a tape recorder): "I can't read it, I need my glasses."
Frank Costanza (on a tape recorder): "You don't need glasses! You're just weak, weak!"
Estelle Costanza (on a tape recorder): (shouts) "Leave him alone!"
Frank Costanza (on a tape recorder): "All right, George. It's time for the Festivus Feats of Strength!"
George Costanza: "No! No! Turn it off! No Feats of Strength! I hate Festivus!"
Frank Costanza: "We had some good times."