Recently, my friend Heather from the awesome Seattle-based band the Riffbrokers had a rather unfortunate experience. As she enjoyed an evening out at the movies with her husband, a criminal element couple sidled in next to her and suspiciously bolted as the movie ended and the house lights went up. Heather's bag, which she had set on the floor next to her, was gone, including all the crucial stuff one puts into a purse. Major bummer. Tonight, as she was giving an update to us via Facebook, she referred to the nasty stealers as "thieving ass chickens." This expression instantly delighted me, and I threatened to make a song from the phrase. Here is the result of that musical threat, written, recorded, mixed, and uploaded in WARP SPEED as to cheer Heather and use as today's post goodie. Please to enjoy, and feel free to download it at Soundcloud if you'd like; you don't even have to BOTHER to steal it! Woo hoo!
Me and my guy were going out for the night
Everything was super, everything was tight
Went to the movies, going to see “Lincoln”
Then what happened was really kinda stinkin’
Sittin’ in my seat , everything was groovy
Eating on some popcorn just watching the movie
A couple came in and sat down next to me
Lights went up and my purse was nowhere to be seen
Thieving ass chickens, they stole my bag
Thieving ass chickens, turned a good time into a drag
Thieving ass chickens, they stole my purse
Thieving ass chickens, it’s to you I send this curse
Oh just great, there went all my money
Bumming out me and bumming out my honey
Gone are my credit cards, gone is my phone
Now I gotta call my bank and everyone I know
I hope when they stole my bag and ran down the street
That they were hit by a bus and turned into burger meat
I hope karma gets ‘em, and kicks them in the ass
And next time I go anywhere I ain’t bringin’ cash
Thieving ass chickens, they stole my bag
Thieving ass chickens, turned a good time into a drag
Thieving ass chickens, they stole my purse
Thieving ass chickens it’s to you I send this curse
© Copyright 2008- Marianne Spellman