FIFTEEN WEIRD RECORD COVERS FROM THE GOODWILL IN SHORELINE, WASHINGTON!

Another fun post-dinner Saturday night thrifting excursion once again proved bountiful in the LP castaway bin! For you, FOR YOU ALONE, I brave the wafting smells of ancient dust and "old," endure my fingertips becoming so embedded with record dirt that it feels like I've been cleaning chalkboards all day, and ignore the stares of my fellow Goodwill shoppers as I whoop and smile and take photos of the inexplicable. Let us now take a walk through the past...please to enjoy these odd record covers!

We're going to start off with a bang here...pun intended. WOW. Jimmy Goings is certainly NOT SHY TONIGHT. Fascinating.

I...I...I...well, there's just SO MUCH to ponder here. The best is in the small print: "Formerly Successful Fulfilled Womanhood with Verna Birkey." I may have nightmares about this.

"IT'S LOGGG, IT'S LOGGGG...IT'S BETTER THAN BAD, IT'S GOOD!"

Del Delker is All About Love, so I think she should get together with Jimmy Goings-To-Get-It-ON from Record #1. OH YEAH, SEXEE TIME!

Oh, Jerry. Jerry, Jerry, Jerry.

Now, here I am confused. What is the story here with "An Affair To Remember?" Is this bride his affair? Is she marrying him or someone else? I hope for the latter, because her hair is gonna fall out someday from so much bleach.

WHOA!!! SENOR CORTEZ!!! SETTLE DOWN, BRO!! THE COPS ARE TOTES HIPPED TO YOUR STREET INSANITY!!

I'm imagining this is the girl's expression as a 300-lb drunken German dude in sweaty lederhosen is swinging off a chandelier towards her. Party on, Deutsch-lovers!

What on earth is a "whispering organ sound?" OHHHHHH. I think she's lookin' at it. Uh huh huh huh huh huh. NICE WORK, BRAD.

I wonder if the quotations around the band's name means they are impostors. Or perhaps it's sarcasm. Also, I'm not totally sure what gender the keyboardist is. Also, I bet there wasn't an "Album #2."

MARCH INTO 1985!!!! FALL EDITION! Who bought this? Please, I really want to know.

Oh GOD, I would hope that the "Spamtown Lancers" were a punk band, but since this is from pre-history...I guess not, huh. MILWAUKEE 14!

AAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAH! HAHAHAHAHAH! AAAAAAAAHAHAHAH!!! Aw, come on now.

RAAAAHAHAHAHAH!

JA! DON'T MENTION THE WAR!!!

And finally, Jerry Jordan is TOTALLY ALL DAWWWWWWWW ABOUT GETTIN' A RINGY-DING FROM DA SAVIOR! Notice how the Lawrd Gaad enjoys communicating on primitive telephone apparatus. I bet he's telling Jerry he really digs the daisy on his collar.