HOW SEARS WANTED YOU TO SPEND THE SUMMER OF 1982!

Play baseball in your shed!

Talk on the phone in your new kitchen!

Enjoy some Chopped Beef Dinner and Hawaiian Punch!

Don't get too casual!

Exercise with Bruce Jenner!

Learn the new fad sports craze: soccer! 

Hang to the right!

Chill out in your creepy clown pool!

Have fun pretending you were a medic in the comedic Korean War!

Impress the ladies!

Go ahead...get casual!

Be mystically unavailable!

Enjoy a hand massage!

Hang out with Grandpa and a really tall black dude!

Take up the new sports craze: jogging!

Dress modestly in the park!

Climb the corporate ladder!

Wear socks with espadrilles! 

Play tennis in lavender-colored clothing!

Reupholster your van!

Pretend you are a DAMN BIRD on your $84 swingset!

Get your motor running! Head out on the highway!

Introduce the Zip 'N Tie to your friends at the beach!

Be unavailably gay!

Play tennis in your underwear!

Channel Phoebe Cates and Jennifer Jason Leigh in "Fast Times At Ridgemont High!"

Show off your wardrobe essentials!

Enjoy a beige lifestyle!

Tighten up with Grandma!

And if you're really lucky...hang out with Cheryl Tiegs and her cat!!!